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Fuckin’ Tourists! – Cusco, Peru

2002

FUCKIN’ TOURISTS  – I wish Bin Laden was here to lessen the pollution!

Thought I’d start on a different note – cos not everyday am I feeling in love with the world and I don’t want to mislead you about the nature of 2lst century travel, nor of the moods of this traveler.

Often these past weeks I’ve really had to try hard to stay enthusiastic about being on the road.

The nausea started in northern Bolivia and has heightened dramatically here in Cusco, Peru.

My problem is the masses of stupid f*cks here!

I can understand the attraction of Cusco but the people it attracts are generally dull … those middle-aged package sheep who go to pretentious plaza cafes accompanied by their aloof attitudes.

Or the classic American campus geek on a summer school outing, shrieking loudly and bitching about her friends.

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Mass tourism in Cusco

At a series of Inca ruins yesterday I encountered some examples.

There were these harmless chicks who just sat upon a mountain vista of a almighty ruin and reading novels (nothing related to S America; one was by Nick Hornby and I wondered why bother being there? After all you tend to read to be transported elsewhere).

Another harmless, gormless couple had stripped off to undies, and were sunbathing (and not a swimming pool or beach in sight).

One group of 4 English toffs passed me without acknowledging me or my greeting but later when they were fumbling about for 10 minutes trying to find the other way down from the Inca rock, a little panicked, and ‘not wanting to damage their cameras’, I pointed out the route and they suddenly turned ever so pleasant.

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What can you say: Mass Tourism is ugly.

But what really set me on-fire was when some old American guy started screaming and waving me away with his hands: Outa my photo!

I didn’t even see him – so crowded was the site: each person sharing a turn to interrupt another’s shots.

Anyway, I gave him a loud – “Fuck off! You’re not the only one here, ya cunt!”

That same cunt was at the site less than 10 minutes as he was swished away within his stupid-arse tour group.

And he’d have his photos and boast over some sycophantic dinner party that he’s been there, that he’s experienced Peru.

So call me a travel snob, a complete wanker or a ignorant leper, but it seems that tourism is strangling special places, rapidly depleting the world of any real travel adventure and intelligence – so get there now friends, within the next 10 years to your dream destinations. Or don’t bother (unless a war breaks out: then perfect travel, those early post-war years).

I’ve suddenly been enlightened.

I’ve finally realized that I’m just another dickhead like the rest of them (and even stupider, for being here during the height of the peak season, knowingly).

It’s all so clear now.

I need a beer.

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